Working With Fear

Together we can conquer anything.

Fear can hold us back in many ways. Sometimes fear is obvious. Some of my fears certainly are obvious: fear of heights, fear of public speaking, fear of sharks, fear of dropping things, and fear of flying. But that is not the only fear we need to work on. There are deeper and more impactful fears.

Fear, including fear of shame and even fear of desire, is surprisingly pervasive in U.S. culture. We live in a culture of precarity - many of us go to work in the morning for fear that we will be homeless, unable to eat, and without healthcare. This is the sort of fear that truly constrains us and clouds our decision-making. Worse yet, it often limits what we see. We feel so afraid to look away from that which keeps us safe that we rarely look up to see how big and awesome and welcoming the world, and human community, can be.

Fear need not hold us back. We can recognize fear for what it is - a welcome messenger of danger - and let it be only that. Let it not cloud or unwittingly shape our better judgment.

Here I am rappelling. Worse yet, I am taking a picture of the person who went before me while fumbling my phone over the edge.

And here I am public speaking - telling my colleagues what it is to be me, to be trans, in this particular moment in history.

And above? That's a tiger shark? After debating with my dive buddy as to whether it could possibly be safe to dive with potentially people-eating sharks, like tiger sharks, we saw a shark on our very next dive. I got this photo while I swam right towards it because it was too cool.

While I needed a licensed therapist (which I am not) to stop having panic attacks when flying, my other fears I worked with on my own.

I'd be honored to be there with you while you learn to work with your fears.

Be better.

CONFIDENTIALITY

I offer full confidentiality, including, where appropriate, the attorney-client privilege and the priest-penitent privileges. These mean that, absent an exception, I cannot be compelled to divulge your secrets, not even in court.